Real Life

It’s been almost 35 years since I ran in a competitive road or cross-country race. But on Feb. 25, that will change.

Yes, this old editor who prefers chicken fried steak with extra gravy instead of nutritious salads and soup will participate in the Del City Wild 5K race. Bear in mind, it’s for a good cause as proceeds will benefit the Children’s Cancer Association.

It might be wise for me to start with the one-mile Fun Run, but how would that challenge me? I am going for the gusto, the glory and the recognition of being the first person to pass out in the race. I don’t think death is a possibility, but I’ll probably try to get things right with the Lord a couple of days before the event.

Preparation will be critical, so I’ll hit the gym a few times between now and Feb. 25. I’ll try to cut down on the carb intake, drink water only, pump vitamins into this old body and work on my final quartermile sprint. Please consider that I haven’t always been in my current condition. I actually ran cross-country and track at Northwest Classen High School during my sophomore, junior and senior years.

I can’t lay claim to any trophies or medals back then, but I did finish every race.

That has to count for something. At my current age, finishing is the only result I care about. But back in high school, my goal – as a kid with short legs – was to improve my time each race. That usually happened. I believe, if my memory serves me correctly, the best time I recorded was about 17:30. However, that occurred on a flat course with no Oklahoma wind.

Bear in mind, I have no illusions of hitting that time on Feb. 25. By the 17:30 mark, I’ll be lucky to be on the second mile of my 3.1 mile journey. I’m praying that I don’t puke, pass out or finish behind a 10-year-old kid. I want to finish in a respectable manner with head held high and my legs still attached.

Be prepared

Paraphrasing the Boy Scott motto, I want to be prepared. I’ve taken the liberty of contacting EMSA ambulance service, which will have a bottle of oxygen at the finish line. In addition, my cardiologist will be on standby. I just hope he’s not on the golf course when my heart attack occurs.

If you haven’t guessed, I’m a little out of shape, but I am good to go for the big race. I am pumped, ready and able. Don’t bet against me, either. I’ll run the whole race just to prove the naysayers wrong. Of course, walking is an option if get lightheaded or see Jesus in the distance.

My strategy for the race is to go slow, maintain my snail’s pace and finish sometime that day. That plan will allow me to walk away under my own power, and still live to tell another fish tale to anyone willing to listen. Actually, I’ll probably write another column just like this one about my out-of-body experience that occurred during the race.

Until next time…if there is one!